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Bama jokes

Guest jojo1515

By Guest jojo1515
in AU Football Forum

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Guest jojo1515

Guest jojo1515

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Being bama week, I thought everyone could share their favorite bama jokes. Let's keep it clean ;)

An Alabama fan walks into the doctor's office one day with a hat on. He takes off his hat, and the doctor sees that there is a big frog sitting right on top of his head. The doctor looks at the man and asks him why he has a frog sitting on his head. It was the frog who replied "Actually doc, I was the one who wanted to see you. Can you remove this wart off my butt?"

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WarTim Founding Father

WarTim 3,456

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What is the difference between the munchkin and a jackass? ...don't feel bad. Nobody else can figure it out either...

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Piketiger1990 Community Regular

Piketiger1990 173

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Bubba had a memorable career playing football at Alabama, but after 15 years of study, he had yet to graduate.

Sensing a problem, Alabama’s president called Bubba into his office. He said, “Bubba, everyone loves you. You are the most popular man on campus but if you don’t graduate soon, we’re going to lose our accreditation. Not to worry though, we’ve got a plan. Next Saturday, during halftime of the football game at Bryant Denny , we’re going to give you a little test. Just one question; that’s all. Get it right and you graduate. Get it wrong and you must drop out of school.”

Bubba agreed and studied all week. Halftime came and as he walked out onto the field thousands of Bama fans began chanting in unison, “Bubba, Bubba, Bubba...” Suddenly, everyone got quiet as the president read Bubba’s question over the PA system. “What is 2 plus 2?” Bubba thought and thought and thought. Then with an anxious voice, he sheepishly said, “Four.” Deathly quiet for an awkward 3 or 4 seconds, then the crowd with one unified loud voice began to chant, “One more chance, one more chance!”

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Auctoritas Founding Father

Auctoritas 2,826

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I picked up a load of bowling balls that are going to a newly built bowling alley. I'm driving down the highway and I passed two bama fans standing on the side of the road needing a ride. They were decked out, shirts, hats, and maybe a mouthful of teeth between the two of them. I told them that they can't ride in the cab with me but they can ride in back with the bowling balls.

So off I go, back on the highway, a load of bowling balls and two bama fans in back. I get pulled over by a state trooper and he decides that he needs to inspect my trailer. He opens the trailer doors and sees the two bama fans with the bowling balls, and he then slammed the doors closed, and locks them.

So the cop comes running back up to me and says to me "Get this truck back on the road and DO NOT stop until you've reached the state line, GET OUT OF HERE!"

I was kind of stunned so I asked what the problem was. He said to me "Son, do you realize that two of those bama fan eggs have already hatched?!?"

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CJBas Mentor

CJBas 4

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Bubba had a memorable career playing football at Alabama, but after 15 years of study, he had yet to graduate.

Sensing a problem, Alabama's president called Bubba into his office. He said, "Bubba, everyone loves you. You are the most popular man on campus but if you don't graduate soon, we're going to lose our accreditation. Not to worry though, we've got a plan. Next Saturday, during halftime of the football game at Bryant Denny , we're going to give you a little test. Just one question; that's all. Get it right and you graduate. Get it wrong and you must drop out of school."

Bubba agreed and studied all week. Halftime came and as he walked out onto the field thousands of Bama fans began chanting in unison, "Bubba, Bubba, Bubba..." Suddenly, everyone got quiet as the president read Bubba's question over the PA system. "What is 2 plus 2?" Bubba thought and thought and thought. Then with an anxious voice, he sheepishly said, "Four." Deathly quiet for an awkward 3 or 4 seconds, then the crowd with one unified loud voice began to chant, "One more chance, one more chance!"

That's funny!
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Guest jojo1515

Guest jojo1515

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I picked up a load of bowling balls that are going to a newly built bowling alley. I'm driving down the highway and I passed two bama fans standing on the side of the road needing a ride. They were decked out, shirts, hats, and maybe a mouthful of teeth between the two of them. I told them that they can't ride in the cab with me but they can ride in back with the bowling balls.

So off I go, back on the highway, a load of bowling balls and two bama fans in back. I get pulled over by a state trooper and he decides that he needs to inspect my trailer. He opens the trailer doors and sees the two bama fans with the bowling balls, and he then slammed the doors closed, and locks them.

So the cop comes running back up to me and says to me "Get this truck back on the road and DO NOT stop until you've reached the state line, GET OUT OF HERE!"

I was kind of stunned so I asked what the problem was. He said to me "Son, do you realize that two of those bama fan eggs have already hatched?!?"

Good stuff!

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WarTim Founding Father

WarTim 3,456

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How can you tell if a uat redneck is married? Redman juice stains on the passenger side door too!!!

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cptau Founding Father

cptau 169

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What do Auburn graduates and uat fans have in common.

Neither have taken any classes at that college in Tuscaloosa.

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around4ever Founding Father

around4ever 4,139

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Two bammers have been walking in the woods for eight hours when they stop and one turns to the other and says, "I'm cutting the next Christmas tree we find, lights or no lights."

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stealthyfan Veteran

stealthyfan 124

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Two Auburn engineering student are driving to the beach for Spring Break in their pick-up. They notice three Bama football players hitch hiking and stop to give them a ride, but they had to sit in the back. All agree and down the road they go. Ahour later a deer runs into the road and the Auburn engineers swerve to miss him and fly off uncontrolled and land in a deep pond. As the truck sinks, the engineers know they can open their doors and swim to safety when the cab fills and the pressure equalizes, and do so. Unfortunately the Bama football players all died because they couldn't open the tailgate.

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Charleyrogers24 Proficient

Charleyrogers24 0

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What do you call a beautiful woman on the arm of an Alabama Fan?

A: You call it a Tattoo!!!!

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