What's Your Birth Order?

[ToraGirl 5,498]

Right up there with personality theory is a little something something about how birth order can affect us from childhood to present.  Who are the firsts, the middles, the youngests, the onlies?

My dad was an only ("Miracle Baby Only") born to older (one-college-educated) parents...my mom was the 4th of 7, 6 who made it to adulthood, born to a farming couple who built serviceable houses on the side.  Oh, wow, what an interesting upbringing for younger brother and me! 

Yes, I'm the (over-responsible, people-pleasing, high-achieving, perfectionistic, Senior Superlative "Most Dependable", learning-to-relax, hot mess work-in-progress saved by the grace of God) FIRST BORN (of two).  

What about you?  And do you fit the stereotypical mold or...?

[augolf1716 21,096]

I was the baby of the family for a while second born with an older brother. Then out of the blue my parent adopted a 6 year old girl when I was 24. My parents were in their late 50's when they adopted. So I went from the baby of the family to middle............... 

[augolf1716 21,096]

Just now, augolf1716 said:

I was the baby of the family for a while second born with an older brother. Then out of the blue my parent adopted a 6 year old girl when I was 24. My parents were in their late 50's when they adopted. So I went from the baby of the family to middle............... 

 

[ellitor 33,062]

I'm an only. What the stereotype there is I have no clue.

[McLoofus 35,182]

2 hours ago, augolf1716 said:

I was the baby of the family for a while second born with an older brother. Then out of the blue my parent adopted a 6 year old girl when I was 24. My parents were in their late 50's when they adopted. So I went from the baby of the family to middle............... 

Semi-similar story, except I'm only 10 years older than my adopted sister. So I'm baby boy and middle child.

I don't like to share and I'm very confrontation-averse. I'm a people pleaser, as long as it doesn't interfere with me time.

[around4ever 4,139]

I am the baby.  I have two older sisters, 8 and 10 years older than me.  I don’t think I was planned. 

[augolf1716 21,096]

3 hours ago, McLoofus said:

Semi-similar story, except I'm only 10 years older than my adopted sister. So I'm baby boy and middle child.

I don't like to share and I'm very confrontation-averse. I'm a people pleaser, as long as it doesn't interfere with me time.

My sister and I became very close after she was adopted. She always felt abandoned when she realized she was adopted even though my parent were great with her. She came to live with wife/me when she was 19 in Atlanta. She's doing great and of course she loves Auburn 

[ToraGirl 5,498]

23 hours ago, ellitor said:

I'm an only. What the stereotype there is I have no clue.

My DAD was the stereotypical only, but you may have escaped it...😉

[ToraGirl 5,498]

21 hours ago, around4ever said:

I am the baby.  I have two older sisters, 8 and 10 years older than me.  I don’t think I was planned. 

In teaching, I have taught many "surprise 3rds or 4ths". They are usually most delightful and the (usually older) parent support is terrific. I think you WERE planned...they were hoping for a boy. 🍁❤🦋

[ellitor 33,062]

26 minutes ago, ToraGirl said:

My DAD was the stereotypical only, but you may have escaped it...😉

What's the stereotype there?

[McLoofus 35,182]

18 hours ago, augolf1716 said:

My sister and I became very close after she was adopted. She always felt abandoned when she realized she was adopted even though my parent were great with her. She came to live with wife/me when she was 19 in Atlanta. She's doing great and of course she loves Auburn 

My sister's emotions about it seem to manifest a different way. Less about consciously feeling abandoned and more about a subconscious *fear* of abandonment. She really doesn't want to get too far from home. And hasn't. But she's doing well.

[kevon67 2,368]

18 hours ago, augolf1716 said:

My sister and I became very close after she was adopted. She always felt abandoned when she realized she was adopted even though my parent were great with her. She came to live with wife/me when she was 19 in Atlanta. She's doing great and of course she loves Auburn 

That's a feeling that's almost impossible to explain......My parents treated me better than some of my friends biological parents treated them........At 50 plus I still struggle to understand the feeling of abandonment despite knowing the reason I was put up for adoption.

[ToraGirl 5,498]

41 minutes ago, ellitor said:

What's the stereotype there?

Simply a stereotype...Have to have their own way...all about them...center of the universe...spoiled rotten...not used to sharing. That's one end of the spectrum. Others are better at relating to adults than peers...generally more mature for their age...some become perfectionists (Daddy had a hard time admitting his weaknesses or mistakes...common to all of us...).

That can't be you! In fairness, he told me later in life that he always wished for a sibling...❤❤

[ToraGirl 5,498]

22 minutes ago, kevon67 said:

That's a feeling that's almost impossible to explain......My parents treated me better than some of my friends biological parents treated them........At 50 plus I still struggle to understand the feeling of abandonment despite knowing the reason I was put up for adoption.

Kevon, we talk about this a lot in our classroom because my babies come from very diverse families. I believe I have some rescues in my midst from infancy or young toddlerhood...I tell them they were answers to prayers and CHOSEN, CHOSEN, CHOSEN...out of all the babies in the world, they were the ones! My heart just bursts when families tell me their stories. Kevon, you were/are a CHOSEN answer to prayer. Willfully chosen, irreplaceable, destined to do and affect on earth what no one else can. Someone hand me a Kleenex...NOW! I wish I could hop thru this screen and hug you!!

[AUsince72 11,084]

I'm from a fairly small immediate family. 

Dad (born in Birmingham in '46) has a younger sister and had a younger brother.  I have 2 first cousins from each.  I never met my Grandfather as he passed (when they lived in Kansas) when my Dad was only a teen.  My Granny moved back to Birmingham, got her nursing degree, and finished raising all 3 on her own.  She was so sweet but so tough too!

Mom (Birmingham in '47) is an only child to a half-blood Cherokee Mom, who worked as her church's secretary & 1st Gen American Dad (from Pittsburgh, PA) who's parents immigrated from Poland (which I believe was Prussia at the time).  Fun Fact: My Granddaddy was an airplane mechanic who kept Recon Aircraft going during the Battle of the Bulge in WW2.  My Mom's got a photo album with some outstanding photos of his time in Europe during the war.

I am the older of 2 brothers, born in B'ham in '72 & my brother, Matthew, was born in Lawrenceville, GA (where we grew up) in '76.  I worked selling & tech support in the industrial hardware business for awhile then moved to automation & pneumatics for industrial & theme park applications (with a brief stint selling blood serum for cellular research in between) for roughly 23 years until my cancer & treatments "retired" me so annoying the crap out of people on this message board is my "job" now. 😎

My brother has a wife and 2 kids.  He adopted his wife's son from a previous marriage and they have a daughter of their own.  My nephew is is in the Army Reserves but has trained with Rangers and, I think is contemplating a full-time military career.  However,  at this time he's a Freshman at Jacksonville State (last I heard he was also considering walking on as a WR for the Gamecocks but I don't have any updates).  My niece is a Freshman in HS and, I THINK, playing volleyball.  ....clearly we don't keep in touch as much as we should.

All of my immediate family live in the Ft. Payne area.

My wife's family OTOH? Huuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuge!!!!!!

Sonya was born in Knoxville, TN.  I'm purposefully leaving her age a mystery because I'm wise.  Both of her parents each had 6 siblings (some hanging with Our Lord & Savior now).  Her Dad is the second oldest on his side, her Mom also is second oldest.  Between all of the children & grandchildren these people have......I think her family makes up half of Knoxville, LOL!  In our wedding photos, my family is just a few people with a few friends.   My wife's side?  Just her family alone required the photographer to back WAY up and take two wide angle lens shots....one for each side.  That was 23 years ago.  It's grown exponentially since!

My wife and I adopted Ruby & Emerald (Emme) in 2012, when they were 3 yrs old.  They were born from one side of my wife's family so The Good Lord worked it out for us to keep them in the family! ❤️

[ToraGirl 5,498]

4 minutes ago, AUsince72 said:

I'm from a fairly small immediate family. 

Dad (born in Birmingham in '46) has a younger sister and had a younger brother.  I have 2 first cousins from each.  I never met my Grandfather as he passed (when they lived in Kansas) when my Dad was only a teen.  My Granny moved back to Birmingham, got her nursing degree, and finished raising all 3 on her own.  She was so sweet but so tough too!

Mom (Birmingham in '47) is an only child to a half-blood Cherokee Mom, who worked as her church's secretary & 1st Gen American Dad (from Pittsburgh, PA) who's parents immigrated from Poland (which I believe was Prussia at the time).  Fun Fact: My Granddaddy was an airplane mechanic who kept Recon Aircraft going during the Battle of the Bulge in WW2.  My Mom's got a photo album with some outstanding photos of his time in Europe during the war.

I am the older of 2 brothers, born in B'ham in '72 & my brother, Matthew, was born in Lawrenceville, GA (where we grew up) in '76.  I worked selling & tech support in the industrial hardware business for awhile then moved to automation & pneumatics for industrial & theme park applications (with a brief stint selling blood serum for cellular research in between) for roughly 23 years until my cancer & treatments "retired" me so annoying the crap out of people on this message board is my "job" now. 😎

My brother has a wife and 2 kids.  He adopted his wife's son from a previous marriage and they have a daughter of their own.  My nephew is is in the Army Reserves but has trained with Rangers and, I think is contemplating a full-time military career.  However,  at this time he's a Freshman at Jacksonville State (last I heard he was also considering walking on as a WR for the Gamecocks but I don't have any updates).  My niece is a Freshman in HS and, I THINK, playing volleyball.  ....clearly we don't keep in touch as much as we should.

All of my immediate family live in the Ft. Payne area.

My wife's family OTOH? Huuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuge!!!!!!

Sonya was born in Knoxville, TN.  I'm purposefully leaving her age a mystery because I'm wise.  Both of her parents each had 6 siblings (some hanging with Our Lord & Savior now).  Her Dad is the second oldest on his side, her Mom also is second oldest.  Between all of the children & grandchildren these people have......I think her family makes up half of Knoxville, LOL!  In our wedding photos, my family is just a few people with a few friends.   My wife's side?  Just her family alone required the photographer to back WAY up and take two wide angle lens shots....one for each side.  That was 23 years ago.  It's grown exponentially since!

My wife and I adopted Ruby & Emerald (Emme) in 2012, when they were 3 yrs old.  They were born from one side of my wife's family so The Good Lord worked it out for us to keep them in the family! ❤️

Love every bit of this. Every bit! Blessed girls, beautiful family! Wouldn't mind a Smokies hike on this fair, fine day. Prayers for your continued recovery and thriving! 

Knoxville was our playground during our 1990-94 Asbury (KY) seminary years. Mike student-pastored two small UMC country churches straddling Claiborne and Campbell Counties...Lafollette area. Taught middle school all week in Harrodsburg (KY)...we drove 2.45 hours south every Friday afternoon and back up on Sundays. Fun, adventurous times...pre-kids, of course!

[gr82be 14,401]

I'm the youngest of three, two older sisters. My oldest sister was born in Rhode Island and my youngest sister and I were born at the hospital at Maxwell Air Force Base Montgomery, AL. My dad was retired US Navy. My sisters say I got away with more because I was a boy. It didn't feel like I got away with much of anything. My parents were strict but very fair so no complaints. We had what we needed but not a bunch of extras. My mom was quick to say no but my dad was a little more lenient. He was an incredible man, his father died when he was around 6 in a car accident. His mother must have freaked out because she left him with relatives and never returned. This was during the Depression so it was tough. He was raised by Christian family members and when he was 17 he joined the Navy. As 18 he was on the Hornet that was torpedoed and sunk by the Japanese. The engine room door jammed. He survived by help from two crewmen who he had never seen nor saw afterward. If you believe in divine intervention you could say it was. They led him through a duct that a big man would have never gotten through. He might very well have died that day if not for the mystery crewmen. He was my earthly hero. A lot of people say I look like him but I hope I live like him. 

[AUsince72 11,084]

5 minutes ago, gr82be said:

I'm the youngest of three, two older sisters. My oldest sister was born in Rhode Island and my youngest sister and I were born at the hospital at Maxwell Air Force Base Montgomery, AL. My dad was retired US Navy. My sisters say I got away with more because I was a boy. It didn't feel like I got away with much of anything. My parents were strict but very fair so no complaints. We had what we needed but not a bunch of extras. My mom was quick to say no but my dad was a little more lenient. He was an incredible man, his father died when he was around 6 in a car accident. His mother must have freaked out because she left him with relatives and never returned. This was during the Depression so it was tough. He was raised by Christian family members and when he was 17 he joined the Navy. As 18 he was on the Hornet that was torpedoed and sunk by the Japanese. The engine room door jammed. He survived by help from two crewmen who he had never seen nor saw afterward. If you believe in divine intervention you could say it was. They led him through a duct that a big man would have never gotten through. He might very well have died that day if not for the mystery crewmen. He was my earthly hero. A lot of people say I look like him but I hope I live like him. 

Wow!  What a story about your Dad!  Sounds like a very nice family. 😀

[fredst 9,064]

I’m a middle with every trait of first-born (the reasons for which became obvious when I was older). There’s a birth order book that explains the personality types for each child in my family and totally nails them. Uncanny.....