AUUSN 823 Posted December 22, 2014 Share Posted December 22, 2014 By Philip Bump and Chris Cillizza December 22 at 8:00 AM In the world of political analysis, there are few more urgent tasks than shuffling people in the news into the appropriate political bucket, the better to understand their motivations and likely future endorsements. It is in that spirit that we reached out to prominent political consultants and politicians to ask them to offer their opinion on the week's biggest newsmaker: Kris Kringle, a.k.a. Santa Claus. Our thanks to those who participated -- and, of course, if other prominent figures (President Obama, Pope Benedict) wish to weigh in, please email. And our thanks to internet hero @darth, who created our Reagan-and-Kennedy-in-Santa-hat icons. Newt Gingrich, former House Speaker Santa Claus is clearly a Republican. He actually delivers what he promises. He and the elves believe in hard work. He helps children for free, he doesn't put them deeper in debt. He unites all of us in a love of Christmas. He isn't a divider. Paul Begala, Democratic media consultant Santa is definitely a Democrat. Rather than cater to the wealthiest one percent he rewards people who work hard and play by the rules. And while he's not a participant in the first lady's anti-obesity campaign he's very concerned about climate change. After all, Rudolph can fly but he can't swim. Reince Priebus, Republican National Committee Chairman Republican: 1. Imagine a Democrat wearing that much red. 2. If you like your gift, you can actually keep your gift. 3. He looks a lot like Rutherford B. Hayes. 4. Would Mrs. Obama approve of all the milk and cookies? Jason Ralston, Democratic consultant As someone greatly impacted by and deeply concerned about climate change -- and who has negative views on coal -- Santa is clearly a Democrat. Billy Moore, Democratic lobbyist My sister Kiki suggests he is a Democrat: "He cares about all the children, rich or poor. He cares about the elf's as workers and he believes there is good in the world to be celebrated not just evil to defend against. He believes in holding the naughty accountable. Ultimately he knows is role is important for the future." I, however, recall the reporting of my fellow Longhorn Berke Breathed back in 1981 that demonstrated Santa's Republican roots when he rejected the demands of PETCO (Professional Elves Toy-Making and Craft Organization) for higher wages, a hot tub in the locker room, and "short broads." When the elves went on strike, President Reagan fired them all and replaced them with out-of-work air traffic controllers. The resulting riot forced Santa to rehire, but in humiliating new positions such as reindeer. Thus, it is undeniable that Santa Claus is a Reagan Democrat. Jim Margolis, Obama media consultant Republican... out of shape, obsessed with red, employees required to work day and night, addicted to coal. Bruce Mehlman, Republican lobbyist He's a straight, white, older male running a rural, non-unionized, faith-based small business premised on accountability (naughty/nice list), meritocracy (Rudolph in front) and absence of government intervention. It don't get much more Republican than that! Glen Bolger, Republican pollster Of course Santa's a Republican. He DID build his business himself, and has stayed on the job because he knows estate taxes are double taxation. Santa is all of the above on energy too, relying on reindeer power, coal, and cookie power to get him through his own Election Day (at least he always wins!). John Anzalone, Democratic pollster He is a Democrat because he goes to everyone's house and his benchmark for "naughty" is very low. If he was a Republican he would profile to a point where only around 25% of Households would get a visit. Alex Castellanos, Republican media consultant He knows if you've been bad or good, which makes him an advocate of meritocracy and, most likely, a Republican. On the other hand, he only works one day a year, which could make him, not only a Democrat, but a federal employee. Howard Wolfson, former deputy mayor of New York City Can I say he is an independent? He insists on accountability and engages in surveillance like a Republican and dispenses largesse with no regard for budgets like a Democrat. Rep. Steve Israel (D-N.Y.) Republican. This is a guy who is so beholden to the coal lobby that he's been known to force it on small children. On the other hand, the whole reindeer-powered sleigh thing qualifies him as a pro environmental Democrat. Anyway, I have to light my menorah now. What's that you ask? How would The Fix categorize Santa Claus? Well, we'd say that he is a moderate who could bring both parties together to effect meaningful policy reforms. Because he doesn't exist. http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/the-fix/wp/2014/12/22/is-santa-a-republican-or-a-democrat/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TexasTiger 12,829 Posted December 22, 2014 Share Posted December 22, 2014 He's disgusted with both parties. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AUUSN 823 Posted December 22, 2014 Author Share Posted December 22, 2014 I bet he is a big fan of the NSA. I mean he knows when you are sleeping, he knows when you're awake, he knows when you've been bad or good... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TexasTiger 12,829 Posted December 22, 2014 Share Posted December 22, 2014 I bet he is a big fan of the NSA. I mean he knows when you are sleeping, he knows when you're awake, he knows when you've been bad or good... The ultimate big brother-- at least the good get rewarded. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
quietfan 233 Posted December 22, 2014 Share Posted December 22, 2014 Don't know if he personally identifies with either party, however: At least one night a year he is an illegal alien who enters the country without proper paperwork...and he commits countless burglaries/breaking-and-enterings during that night! Is his aircraft FAA certified? And exactly how much stuff does he carry in that sack that he doesn't check through customs or pay import duties on? (He may also be a shill for the milk and cookie industries...) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Proud Tiger 4,261 Posted December 22, 2014 Share Posted December 22, 2014 For sure he is POLARized. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WarTim 3,456 Posted December 22, 2014 Share Posted December 22, 2014 He rewards The NICE. Punishes the Naughty. No question about it.... He is a Conservative!!! :bananadance: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AUtiger98 24 Posted December 22, 2014 Share Posted December 22, 2014 I'm certain he's a Democrat... Has little to do with the true meaning of Christmas and is based on one of the biggest lies in the history of mankind. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Texan4Auburn 1,626 Posted December 22, 2014 Share Posted December 22, 2014 Conservative - all he does is eat cookies, is fat, exploits elves for labor (though he does politic for deporting them to the south pole), and casts judgement on young children. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
autigeremt 6,598 Posted December 23, 2014 Share Posted December 23, 2014 He's disgusted with both parties. Perfect answer. You might be catching on after all. lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
homersapien 11,362 Posted December 23, 2014 Share Posted December 23, 2014 I'm certain he's a Democrat... Has little to do with the true meaning of Christmas and is based on one of the biggest lies in the history of mankind. I like the irony of this post, but you may have to be an atheist or agnostic to really see it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
homersapien 11,362 Posted December 23, 2014 Share Posted December 23, 2014 For sure he is POLARized. Arrrrrrghh....... Actually that's pretty good PT. You never show us your punny side. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AUtiger98 24 Posted December 23, 2014 Share Posted December 23, 2014 Conservative - all he does is eat cookies, is fat, exploits elves for labor (though he does politic for deporting them to the south pole), and casts judgement on young children. That's the spirit. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AUtiger98 24 Posted December 23, 2014 Share Posted December 23, 2014 I'm certain he's a Democrat... Has little to do with the true meaning of Christmas and is based on one of the biggest lies in the history of mankind. I like the irony of this post, but you may have to be an atheist or agnostic to really see it. For the record, the lie part is referring to Santa, flying reindeer ect. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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