Fulmer Standings Updated

[AUld fAUx@ 2,584]

Points awarded through end of June show AU still unranked and pointless.

In fact, the whole conference is rather uncompetitive so far.

Only 4 teams even eligible, with UA leading, tied for 19.

https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1zzu_Kem1BwG_gFYrfb5guhJ09qDXK9Jldrbkt-JIxMQ/edit#gid=1952649360

[Tigerbelle 5,299]

Don't tempt fate.....

[AUld fAUx@ 2,584]

On 7/10/2017 at 8:34 AM, AUld fAUx@ said:

Points awarded through end of June show AU still unranked and pointless.

In fact, the whole conference is rather uncompetitive so far.

Only 4 teams even eligible, with UA leading, tied for 19.

https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1zzu_Kem1BwG_gFYrfb5guhJ09qDXK9Jldrbkt-JIxMQ/edit#gid=1952649360

On further review, the "Offenses" button is more interesting reading than the team-competition sheet.

Apparently, 4/25/17, 13 student athletes from Louisiana (the committee awarded teamwork bonus points) ..."stole: One Xbox game system, the Xbox games “Grand Theft Auto V” and “Metal Gear,” an LG-brand TV, a gold chain, an Aeropostale-brand watch, three pairs of Jordan shoes, two pairs of Adidas shoes, a Nike backpack, four pairs of boxers, eight-and-a-half pairs of socks, three coats, three dollar bills, a Ragin’ Cajuns hat, one ski cap, one pair of jeans, one belt, a training speed ladder, a toenail clipper and one bottle of hair lotion"

Eight-and-a half pairs of socks? Nobody could possibly make this up.

[AUGoo 2,403]

Toe nail clippers?

 

[stoic-one 1,519]

Whatever, lotion?

 

[AUld fAUx@ 2,584]

15 minutes ago, stoic-one said:

Whatever, lotion?

 

Apparently, on the shopping list.

[Tigerbelle 5,299]

4 pairs of boxers? Used underwear? Just...ewww .  

[AUld fAUx@ 2,584]

1 hour ago, Tigerbelle said:

4 pairs of boxers? Used underwear? Just...ewww .  

The site doesn't make it clear, but one might assume (by the list) that the "shopping" spree took place at a store rather than at a residence (i.e., new underwear?). Nonetheless, concur, ewww.

[Tigerbelle 5,299]

Ok then. I thought it was a residence......because 8.5 pairs of socks is tough to steal in a store. They don't sell them individually and they aren't packaged with half a sock. Plus...3 dollar bills?

Whatever...it was a stupid way for those kids to ruin everything they had going for them.

[weagl1 1,754]

How many points do you get for the head coach calling ho's from his university cell phone?

[gr82be 13,468]

On 7/12/2017 at 10:29 AM, AUGoo said:

Toe nail clippers?

 

Maybe the half pair of socks was to keep one foot warm while he clipped his toenails on the other foot. 

[AUld fAUx@ 2,584]

1 hour ago, weagl1 said:

How many points do you get for the head coach calling ho's from his university cell phone?

From https://www.reddit.com/r/TheFulmerCup/wiki/index

Probably 6-8, but may be some bonus points there as well. Separate coach award:

The Coach Mike Haywood "Leading by Example" Award

Given to the coach or administrator who earns the most points and/or gets fired in the most embarrassing fashion. This award does not have to be awarded annually and is completely up to the Committee.

Points	Crime	Notes
25	Cannibalism	Bonus infraction if NCAA guidelines on portion size are exceeded
20	Murder
15	Attempted Murder	Partial credit for incomplete
9	Bestiality	Baaaaad
6-8	Sex Crimes
5	Grand Larceny	Theft on a level so outrageous it demands to be called a 'caper'
4	Possession with Intent to Sell	Including just having too many drugs on you in the first place
4	Vehicle Theft
3-4	Misdemeanor/Felony Assault
3	DUI/DWI/OWI	"Driving through houses drunk" charges may earn extra credit
3	Miscellaneous felony
3	Possession (Non-Weed)
2-4	Domestic Violence
2	Underage Drinking	Rules is rules
2	Marijuana Use/Possession	The player has to be cited for it, so this gives certain states a built-in exemption
1	Assorted Petty Misdemeanors/Citations
1	Repeat offenders
1	Teamwork
?	Miscellaneous Bonus	Crimes with flair, pizzazz or obvious pointworthiness
?	Other	Any other violations considered on an individual basis by the voting committee