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Sports World Christmas Gift List


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Well, it's the Christmas season, my favorite time of the year.  And every year about this time, I make out a list of gifts I'd like to give in the sports world.  Below is my list for this year:

For Gus and the Tigers,
Now this is no con,
I’d give them a senior,
Who else? Kerryon.

For Jarret the fumbler,
Yes I’ll make this call,
Good hands that would help him,
Hold onto the ball.

For AU fans patience,
Malzahn we must trust,
Our eggs and our future,
Are now on his bus.

To AU fans global,
Yes I’ve heard their cry,
I’d give a new AD,
Who knows not Pat Dye.

To Bruce and our hoopers,
No snake oil I’d sell,
I’d simply give clearance,
To Austin, Danjel.

To Chucky the person,
Who screwed us you see,
A cell full of big boys,
Who don't have ED.

Our girls on the diamond,
I'd lighten their way,
And give them a coach who,
Won't make them his prey.

For Bama and Nicky,
I mean them no harm,
I’d inject some magic,
In Jalen’s lame arm.

For Bammers all over,
The pride to stand tall,
‘Cause Santa ain’t bringing,
Another glass ball.

To Vols fans in Knoxville,
I say with no feign,
I’d sure love to give them,
A head coach named Lane.

For Jimbo the traitor,
The coward, the skank,
I’d put all his dough in,
An unguarded bank.

For LSU Cajuns,
Wherever they be,
The strength to withstand,
Eddie’s second of three.

For Brett fired from Arky,
And all of his kin,
I'd give them a free ride,
Back to the Big 10.

For Tiger a driver,
A wedge, a cigar,
Whatever he may need,
To help him make par.

For Pop and the San Spurs,
It’s easy as pie,
I’d give them their big wish,
A healthy Kawhi.

And I’d also give them,
To help guard the rim,
The youthful arrival,
Of David and Tim.

And since they are so old,
So long in the tooth,
To Tony and Manu,
The fountain of youth.

For Magic and Walton,
I’d brighten their day,
And transfer Lavar to,
Guantonimo Bay.

For much maligned Lonzo,
I’d somehow teach him,
No points are awarded,
For chipping the rim.

For Cavs fans all over,
A prayer and some hugs,
‘Cause it’s surely coming,
4 straight from the Dubs.

For Eagles in Philly,
A reprieve from hell,
I’d give QB Carson,
A new ACL.

For Jerry and Cowboys,
More precious than pearls,
I’d give them a tailback,
That don’t beat up girls.

For BronBron and Tyron,
The kings of the joint,
I’d give them back Kyrie,
To run their dull point.

For Gordon and Boston,
And for goodness sakes,
A new 4 leaf clover,
To prevent bad breaks.

To Robert and Billy,
And for Boston too,
I’d give Jimmy G,
‘Cause you stepped in the poo.

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