Jenny AU-92 0 Posted July 21, 2006 Share Posted July 21, 2006 Okay, with all the world cup soccer brouhaha over a yo' momma insult that cost France the game (HAHA!) I thought it might be fun to make a list of our favorite yo momma insults. I stole the idea from Rick Riley in SI this week - he talks about the impact of being "yo momma'd" and throws out a few of his own. My corndog made a good point about how wimpy that soccer guy was. Just think about the level of major insults traded on the line in REAL football. Yo momma, yo sister, yo dog, yo ass, yo bitch, etc. And those are the nice ones! That soccer dude would never make it in real football. So, courtesy of Rick Riley, here's my favorite yo momma: Yo momma so fat, the back of her neck looks like a pack of hot dogs. Here's one I made up myself. Yo momma so stupid, when she decided to be a crack whore, she started screwing plumbers... Anyone care to join in the fun???? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SupperClub 0 Posted July 21, 2006 Share Posted July 21, 2006 Yo mama so fat she eats Wheat Thicks. Yo mama so fat she had to go to Sea World to get baptized Yo mama so fat whenever she goes to the beach the tide comes in! Yo mama so fat when she got hit by a bus, she said, "Who threw that rock?" Yo mama so fat she sat on the beach and Greenpeace threw her in! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AWK 0 Posted July 21, 2006 Share Posted July 21, 2006 Yo mama's so dumb, she thought those were funny. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tiger in Spain 0 Posted July 21, 2006 Share Posted July 21, 2006 Yo momma so ugly even Rice Krispies won't talk to her! Yo momma so ugly she turned Medusa to stone! Yo momma so ugly that when she cries the tears run down the back of her head because they're afraid of her face! Yo momma so fat she wakes up in sections! Yo momma so fat even her clothes have stretch marks! Yo momma so fat the National Hurricane Center has to assign names to her farts! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BamaGrad03 146 Posted July 21, 2006 Share Posted July 21, 2006 Yo momma's so fat some kids were talkin about kool-aid and she came bustin through the wall Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WarTim 3,456 Posted July 21, 2006 Share Posted July 21, 2006 Yo momma is Sooooooooooo FAT that she once wore a Malcolm X t-shirt and a helicopter attempted to land on her. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MDM4AU 330 Posted July 21, 2006 Share Posted July 21, 2006 Yo mama's teeth are so crooked, when she smiles it looks like she's throwing up gang signs! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ranger12 46 Posted July 21, 2006 Share Posted July 21, 2006 I find this thread totally offensive to those that have fat and ugly mommas. Captain Liger and saniflush are going to be very hurt when they this thread. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MDM4AU 330 Posted July 21, 2006 Share Posted July 21, 2006 Yo mama is so fat, when God said, "Let there be Light," she had to get out the way! Yo mama is so fat, Chapstick had to invent a spray! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BamaGrad03 146 Posted July 21, 2006 Share Posted July 21, 2006 Yo mama's teeth are so crooked, when she smiles it looks like she's throwing up gang signs! 250706[/snapback] This one has my vote so far! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AUChizad 0 Posted July 21, 2006 Share Posted July 21, 2006 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AWK 0 Posted July 21, 2006 Share Posted July 21, 2006 Yo mama so ugly Ted Dansen won't date her. Yo momma so ugly they filmed "Gorillas in the Mist" in her shower. Yo mama's so fat, I had to take a train and two busses just to get on her good side. Yo mama's so fat, all the restaurants in town have signs that say: "Maximum Occupancy: 240 Patrons OR Yo Mama" Yo mama's so fat, she uses diet soap. Yo mama's so fat, she doesn't have love handles, she has a roll bar. Yo mama's so fat, she puts mayonnaise on aspirin. Yo mama's so fat, her blood type is rocky-road. Yo mama's so fat, when she went to a dating service, they matched her up with Detroit. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Liger 0 Posted July 21, 2006 Share Posted July 21, 2006 Ranger12's momma is so fat she uses a trash can for a thimble. Ranger12's momma is so fat she uses a VCR for a pager. Ranger12's momma's gums are so black she spits YooHoo. Ranger12's momma is so ugly she wears a T-bone steak around her neck to get the dog to play with her. Tell your mom I said 'hi.' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ranger12 46 Posted July 21, 2006 Share Posted July 21, 2006 Ranger12's momma is so fat she uses a trash can for a thimble. 250752[/snapback] I'm sorry. I should not have embarrassed you like that. I should have known you would have wanted your momma's condition to be a secret. Anyway, my momma don't sew. BTW...how goes that exciting classroom training at Ft. Gordon? You probably have plenty of time to make up "your momma" jokes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Liger 0 Posted July 21, 2006 Share Posted July 21, 2006 Ranger12's momma is so fat she uses a trash can for a thimble. 250752[/snapback] I'm sorry. I should not have embarrassed you like that. I should have known you would have wanted your momma's condition to be a secret. Anyway, my momma don't sew. BTW...how goes that exciting classroom training at Ft. Gordon? You probably have plenty of time to make up "your momma" jokes. 250755[/snapback] LOL, nah, 'yo momma' jokes have never really bothered me. As long as it doesn't affect her ability to make biscuits and chocolate for breakfast when I go home to visit, I don't really care what anyone says. Classes are as "exciting" as ever. I think I set a new class time record yesterday for being able to sleep sitting up without having prop myself up on anything. I turned in the second phase of my staff study paper this morning. My topic? Who will be the 2006 SEC West Champion. Thank you, ITAT. LOL. Other than that it's going OK...although we're about ready to lynch our class leader. Did the Class 6 (liquor store for you civilians) have "Free Sample Friday" when you were here? I just left there about an hour ago. Good stuff. Through a little persuasion I found out that "free sample" is plural. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AUesquire 1 Posted July 21, 2006 Share Posted July 21, 2006 Yo mama so fat, after sex, she smokes turkeys. Yo' mama so dark, fireflies follow her around in the daytime. Yo' mama so dark, she went to night school and they counted her absent. Yo' mama such a skinny skank, she swallowed a olive and half the men left town. When your daddy have sex with yo'mama, he have to roll her in flour and.... Nope, I ain't goin' there. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BamaGrad03 146 Posted July 21, 2006 Share Posted July 21, 2006 Yo momma's so dark, when she stepped out the car, the oil light came on Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AUChizad 0 Posted July 21, 2006 Share Posted July 21, 2006 Did the Class 6 (liquor store for you civilians) have "Free Sample Friday" when you were here? I just left there about an hour ago. Good stuff. Through a little persuasion I found out that "free sample" is plural. Those are awesome. I was a Navy Dependant, and I also worked at the Commissary. I remember when they introduced Captain Morgan Tattoo, which is a cheaper, better (in my opinion) version of Jager. I scored a "free sample" (in plural form), and then when I bought a bottle they threw in a T-shirt and two shot glasses! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TitanTiger 20,472 Posted July 21, 2006 Share Posted July 21, 2006 Yo momma's so fat, her favorite Snapple flavor is gravy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tigermike 3,022 Posted July 21, 2006 Share Posted July 21, 2006 Yo momma like a shot gun, two cocks and she blows! Yo momma like spoiled milk, fat and chunky! Yo momma like a hockey team...changes her pads every three periods! Yo mama so ugly that your father takes her to work with him so that he doesn't have to kiss her goodbye. Yo mama so nasty she brings crabs to the beach. Yo mama has so many teeth missing, it looks like her tounge is in jail. Yo mama teeth are so yellow she spits butter! Yo mama so hairy she look like she got Buchwheat in a headlock. Yo mama so greasy she sweats Crisco! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MDM4AU 330 Posted July 22, 2006 Share Posted July 22, 2006 Yo mama so fat she sweats butter and syrup and got a job at IHOP wiping pancakes across her forehead! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ranger12 46 Posted July 22, 2006 Share Posted July 22, 2006 Did the Class 6 (liquor store for you civilians) have "Free Sample Friday" when you were here? I just left there about an hour ago. Good stuff. Through a little persuasion I found out that "free sample" is plural. 250760[/snapback] I wasn't a drinker when I was in the Army (still not much of one), but I was the designated driver and babysitter for alot of my buddies. I don't recall "Free Sample Fridays". My classmates usually went off base for their drinking enjoyment. We actually hit the Hooters and then the pool hall and that is where most of the drinking took place. I remember those guys consuming lots of pitchers of beer and me having to pour them into the back of the truck. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DaddyBoyAU 119 Posted July 25, 2006 Share Posted July 25, 2006 For those of you who don't remember, there's a classic "yo mama" thread in the woodshed. Seems a corndog wanted to start a flame war... about 10 - 12 posts down the War Eagle Nation lets loose with a series of "yo mama" insults toward the corndog. In my opinion, this thread belongs in the "Classics" forum. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aubie16 1 Posted July 25, 2006 Share Posted July 25, 2006 thanks for linking to that thread! Titan and MDM let loose a tag team on that guy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TitanTiger 20,472 Posted July 25, 2006 Share Posted July 25, 2006 LOL. Forgot about that thread. I have hereby moved it to the Classics Forum for your enjoyment. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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