They went, they served, they came back alive

[Bottomfeeder 244]

Soldiers suffered from Agent Orange exposure

Sunday, September 05, 2004

By PAM HARTMAN

Special to the Register

It's been 33 years since he returned from Vietnam. For 28 of those, we've been about as close as two people can be.

But I still have to be careful about the way I wake him up, whether in the morning or the middle of the night. I still have to use caution when approaching him from behind if he doesn't hear me coming.

And on the few occasions when one of his loved ones is threatened, I see a look come into his eyes that, with the clenched teeth and tight jaw, give me insight into how fierce he could be in a life-or-death battle.

My husband Jon did his tour of duty and came home. There were no special awards or commendations, just a year of time that changed the course of his life forever.

He learned things there that were supposed to make up for the music education he had to leave after the draft: He learned to jump from airplanes and pray the chute didn't get tangled in trees. He learned to trust men whose lives never would have intersected his if the Army hadn't thrown them together into mortal combat.

And he learned to run like hell through a dark jungle without his glasses, which were lost when the Viet Cong made a surprise midnight raid.

Then he returned to the states and learned that not only did he not feel like talking about the experience, but other folks didn't want to hear about it, either. The last thing the people in his life wanted were the details of the ugly war incidents that were beamed to us on the nightly news.

Jon was mustered out, dismissed by the Army, and attempted to pick up life where he left it off. Nothing, of course, was the same -- not family or friends, not his education dreams or his professional hopes. On his own, without support anywhere, he had to start his adult life all over again.

There are tens of thousands of veterans like him, who did their duty and shipped home bringing unexpected baggage with them. Sometimes it was a drug habit; for others, the loss of a limb. For many, it was post traumatic stress, leading to nightmares, flashbacks, depression and difficulty with relationships.

Some came back dying from exposure to Agent Orange or other chemicals the higher-ups decided to use to make jungle fighting harder on the enemy.

Some returned without the ability to trust, or to love, or to believe that the world can still be a good place and that hope is a four-letter word it's OK to let roll through your mind to take the place of the fear that went before it.

Partly because of my faith and in part because I see what warfare can do to the combatants, I am about as anti-war as one can be. Jon doesn't share the passion of these feelings, but he understands and supports the logic.

And he agrees with me that one of the saddest battles to come out of the 2004 presidential campaign is the enmity between veterans -- the crazy debate over the validity of John Kerry's Purple Hearts, and the question of whether he was really a war hero or just another of the grunts who picked up their gear, went where they were told to go, and did their best to stay alive and defeat an enemy whom many times they couldn't even see.

Throwing a war is an old man's passion, a far-too-often first course of action in resolving conflict (or, now, with pre-emptive war, resolving potential conflict). Fighting those wars are the young men and women for whose daily safety we pray.

Woe to the persons who intentionally create dissention among the ranks for the sake of their own political gain.

I'm just grateful that this incredible man I married came back from his war alive. I can't imagine loving him more, or finding him more quali-

fied to be a husband, father or remarkable human being, if he had been wounded or had taken another life under special circumstances so there'd be an extra ribbon to pin to his uniform.

And I wish shame on the person who feels that such distinctions are necessary to give value to the life of another.

For those who question John Kerry's merit and take microscopic looks at his record: Stop. He went, he came back alive, and he's gone on to serve his country in other, valuable ways.

George W. Bush should be a big enough man that he doesn't need to support those who question the danger to the life of another veteran. If he isn't, he demonstrates that he is also not a big enough man to take another shot at being president of the United States.

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George Bush should be a lot of things he can never be because he is a coward. A real true life coward with a battle-axe for a mama. Hell, even I was serving my military duty while dubya was living it up in Texas. I served my country so dubya could have the right to choose between alcohol, cocaine, etc. But, I still did my duty so he could choose to ruin the lives of honest Americans, to include those currently serving in other countries.

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