Words Women Use

[Blonde Wasabi 0]

Words that Women Use

1. Fine

This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right

and you need to shut up.

2. Five Minutes

If she is getting dressed, this is half an hour. Five minutes is

only five minutes if you have just been given 5 more minutes to

watch the game before helping around the house.

3. Nothing

This is the calm before the storm. This means "something," and

you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with 'Nothing'

usually end in "Fine"

4. Go Ahead

This is a dare, not permission. Don't do it.

5. Loud Sigh

This is not actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often

misunderstood by men. A "Loud Sigh" means she thinks you are an

idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and

arguing with you over "Nothing"

6. Thats's okay

This is one of the most dangerous statements that a woman can

make to a man. "That's Okay" means that she wants to think long and

hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

7. Thanks

A woman is thanking you. Do not question it or faint. Just say

you're welcome.

And my personal favorite......

8. WHATEVER

It's a woman's way of saying *!#@ YOU!

[Ranger12 46]

Now she tells me!

Bachelors and those of you engaged...that means you aupcolatiger....this should be required reading.

I'll add another. When you can tell something is wrong and you ask about it, she will say she does not want to talk about or comeback with the "nothing", but a few hours later or the next day, she will get mad at you because you never want to talk.

[keoson7 28]

My favorite is when they ask "how does this look?"

Don't, I repeat, DON'T ever answer, there is no right answer....

Men need to be mind readers as well. If you're married you know what I mean.

[Tiger in Spain 0]

Now she tells me!

Bachelors and those of you engaged...that means you aupcolatiger....this should be required reading.

I'll add another. When you can tell something is wrong and you ask about it, she will say she does not want to talk about or comeback with the "nothing", but a few hours later or the next day, she will get mad at you because you never want to talk.

Nah, they always decide it's time to talk right when you're going to sleep.

[saniflush 0]

Nah, they always decide it's time to talk right when you're going to sleep.

A little off there TIS....when they talk, it makes you go to sleep.

[Tiger in Spain 0]

That gift comes after about the 7th year of marriage. The wife's nagging starts sounding like the singing of a harpy....puts you right down for a hard deep snooze.

At about the 10 year mark, you develop the gift of selective hearing. Tune out that frequency altogether!

[Jenny AU-92 0]

Do you know why men name their penises? So all their decisions won't be made by a total stranger.

God bless each and every one of your wives/girlfriends/significant others. Here's a hint: they aren't just nagging because they feel like it... Nagging is no fun, and makes you feel like a shrew, but sometimes, that's the only weapon left in the arsenal when everything else has failed. By the time she is nagging, guys, you have already FUBAR'd and there ain't no getting out of it.

So the lesson of the day is: if you don't want her to nag, DON'T GIVE HER A REASON!

[DKW 86 7,481]

That gift comes after about the 7th year of marriage. The wife's nagging starts sounding like the singing of a harpy....puts you right down for a hard deep snooze.

At about the 10 year mark, you develop the gift of selective hearing. Tune out that frequency altogether!

Bill Cosby calls it "The Weapon."

[abrnfanatc 6]

1. Fine

This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right

and you need to shut up.

Sorry, but you forgot to add the other meaning of this word.

After asking "Is everything okay?" when a man hears this word uttered from a woman's mouth, it is time to take cover in a few days. Don't even bother trying to decide when, but don't let your guard completely down for at least a week. When you least expect it, the real answer will come out.

Normally when you are trying to get to sleep or with about 2 minutes left in that tie game you are watching.

[WarTim 3,457]

My Lovelly Bride is guilty of none of the above. Why? Because EVERYTHING is MY fault and I learned this lesson LONG ago.

Learn it...Live it.....

[lukeduke 8]

Tim,

You have just published the secret of eternal marriage. If we all learned that, divorce rates would decline sharply. Seriously, you should write a book.

[SLAG-91 1,488]

I don't know if it's genetically encoded or what, but I don't know if men ever truly outgrow a well-executed fart...we just get better at containing our laughter.

Not particularly relevant, but true just the same.

Carry on.

[Tiger in Spain 0]

I don't know if it's genetically encoded or what, but I don't know if men ever truly outgrow a well-executed fart...we just get better at containing our laughter.

Not particularly relevant, but true just the same.

Carry on.

Has anyone here ever used this as a rebuttal during an argument? I'd love to hear the outcome!

Do you know why men name their penises? So all their decisions won't be made by a total stranger.

I'm reminded of that Rodney Carrington song, "Dear Penis. I don't think I like you anymore..."

[WarTim 3,457]

Tim,

You have just published the secret of eternal marriage. If we all learned that, divorce rates would decline sharply. Seriously, you should write a book.

Talk about a "Short Story"..... one page......