Guest Tigrinum Major Posted May 14, 2007 Share Posted May 14, 2007 Scenario: You're sound asleep at 1:30 AM. Your doorbell rings. As you stumble to the window to see who is in your driveway, your left contact falls out. There is no car in your drive. Against your better judgement, you answer the door. A tall, thin man (that you don't know), dressed in shorts, t-shirt and ball cap, carrying an empty canola oil jug is standing on your front porch, saying "Don't shoot, don't shoot me. I ran out of gas about a mile up the road." He continues with a sob story about a girlfriend, blah, blah, blah. There are at least four houses between his car and your house, including at least two that are closer to the road. Do you: a] Shoot him. b] Tell him to get the hell off your porch and don't come back again. c] Let him fill up his jug and send him on his way in his leather personnel carriers. d] Tell him where to find about two gallons of gas in your backyard, go inside, pee, put your contact back in, give him a ride in your truck, make sure he gets his car cranked, telling him he owes you nothing when he offers to pay you, but insisting that he does something nice for someone in need. e] Give him the keys to your truck with the same instructions, because he insists that he has a friend back in the car and he'll be coming right by your house on the way home and you are too sleepy to drive. Discuss. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GalensGhost 0 Posted May 14, 2007 Share Posted May 14, 2007 Scenario: You're sound asleep at 1:30 AM. Your doorbell rings. As you stumble to the window to see who is in your driveway, your left contact falls out. There is no car in your drive. Against your better judgement, you answer the door. A tall, thin man (that you don't know), dressed in shorts, t-shirt and ball cap, carrying an empty canola oil jug is standing on your front porch, saying "Don't shoot, don't shoot me. I ran out of gas about a mile up the road." He continues with a sob story about a girlfriend, blah, blah, blah. There are at least four houses between his car and your house, including at least two that are closer to the road. Do you: a] Shoot him. b] Tell him to get the hell off your porch and don't come back again. c] Let him fill up his jug and send him on his way in his leather personnel carriers. d] Tell him where to find about two gallons of gas in your backyard, go inside, pee, put your contact back in, give him a ride in your truck, make sure he gets his car cranked, telling him he owes you nothing when he offers to pay you, but insisting that he does something nice for someone in need. e] Give him the keys to your truck with the same instructions, because he insists that he has a friend back in the car and he'll be coming right by your house on the way home and you are too sleepy to drive. Discuss. You SHOOT him. Because as soon as you let him in your house, he's going to spill the contents of the canola jug on your rug and then call a 'friend' to bring the Kirby vacuum in so they can get it up for you. Nine hours later, you'll have an $800 hole in your wallet and a black lump of shame burning in your heart. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
saniflush 0 Posted May 14, 2007 Share Posted May 14, 2007 d] Tell him where to find about two gallons of gas in your backyard, go inside, pee, put your contact back in, give him a ride in your truck, make sure he gets his car cranked, telling him he owes you nothing when he offers to pay you, but insisting that he does something nice for someone in need. Except for the telling where to get it. I get it for him. Those of you that know me from on here are not going to believe this, but I can be a very compassionate person to others. (when they aren't idiots) (Of course I am also packin heat!) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
autiger518 1 Posted May 14, 2007 Share Posted May 14, 2007 f:) I wouldn't have answered the door Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Tigrinum Major Posted May 14, 2007 Share Posted May 14, 2007 f:) I wouldn't have answered the door I didn't figure any of the women would. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
otterinbham 0 Posted May 14, 2007 Share Posted May 14, 2007 I like GG's answer. Laughed my ass off. However, I've been in that situation and here's what I did. I fished a baseball bat out of my closet, and told the guy to sit down at the end of my driveway. I kept an eye on him while I got my gas can out of the garage. I walked about 15 feet away, put it down, and said, "Here you go. Put it on my front porch when you're done with it." The next morning, an empty gas can was back on my porch with a "Thanks" note from the guy written on a post-it note. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
autiger518 1 Posted May 14, 2007 Share Posted May 14, 2007 f:) I wouldn't have answered the door I didn't figure any of the women would. ha ha Thats fine, but in actuality I am such a sound sleeper I wouldn't have even heard the doorbell ring. I say this because my neighbors came to the house one time to complain about my rust inhibtor system being so loud that they couldnt sleep, I didnt even hear them ring the doorbell. Now I have helped people out who ask for money for gas at a gas station by swiping my card and putting 10 bucks or so in for them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
autiger518 1 Posted May 14, 2007 Share Posted May 14, 2007 BTW to answer your question...Jesus would have told the guy to go fill his jug up at the water hose on the side of the house and then went back to bed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abrnfanatc 6 Posted May 14, 2007 Share Posted May 14, 2007 f] Make him wait on the porch while I get my gas can out of the garage and bring it back out to him (having my Louisville Slugger in close range at the door). Give him the can and tell him I would give him a ride, but I take the bus and have no car. Also make mention that the gas is for my push mower (so he doesn't ask to borrow the riding one). Watch him walk away until he is completely out of sight and an additional minute or two. Check to make sure all of the deadbolt locks are secure and windows are all locked. Go back to bed. Not that I have thought about this scenario or anything... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Prowler 1 Posted May 14, 2007 Share Posted May 14, 2007 If this is on a weekend, I would be too Drunk by 1:30am to either ear the doorbell or to answer it. If this is during the week, I would never hear the doorbell since I was asleep; but if I did, he wouldn't want to standing on my front porch when I answered it. Because if I wake, up it's hard... real hard for me to go back to sleep. So, weekend - F. Too drunk to realize what's going on. week day - A, G, then B. Shoot him in the leg, proceed to beat the ever living crap out of him, then tell him to drag himself off of my porch... That is if I'm not cranky. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
keoson7 28 Posted May 15, 2007 Share Posted May 15, 2007 Well it was more like 8 o'clock and my wife tells him to "Come on in". I ain't packin' heat so I asked the guy to go back on the porch, and he just wanted a ride because the popo was after him.. So I gave him a ride. But at 1;30 am I may or may not wake up. But I have a gas can under the front porch. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AUJarhead 72 Posted May 15, 2007 Share Posted May 15, 2007 You sleep with your contacts in? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Tigrinum Major Posted May 15, 2007 Share Posted May 15, 2007 I guess Jesus wouldn't have needed contacts, huh? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
otterinbham 0 Posted May 15, 2007 Share Posted May 15, 2007 I guess Jesus wouldn't have needed contacts, huh? Nah. He'd just heal himself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CCTAU 3,677 Posted May 16, 2007 Share Posted May 16, 2007 I like the idea of asking him to wait at the end of the driveway till I get the can. But the bat part is funny. Easier to carry my nine. What if he needed a jump? I have one of those jump-start batteries with the built in cables. They are a great investment at Harbor Freight. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BamaGrad03 0 Posted May 16, 2007 Share Posted May 16, 2007 I would have answered the door with S & W .40 in hand. Probably given him a $10 bill and told him to walk his ass to a gas station. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Tigrinum Major Posted May 16, 2007 Share Posted May 16, 2007 Those are a great invention. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ravad 78 Posted May 16, 2007 Share Posted May 16, 2007 d] Tell him where to find about two gallons of gas in your backyard, go inside, pee, put your contact back in, give him a ride in your truck, make sure he gets his car cranked, telling him he owes you nothing when he offers to pay you, but insisting that he does something nice for someone in need. Pretty close to this but except for the "insisting that he does something nice for someone in need" part and we did not have a full gas can so he got up and drove him to a gas station to get some, My husband actually did this a few months ago. I gave him such a hard time about opening the door that he has since had a heavy duty screen door (one with a bolt lock) installed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SouthLink02 8 Posted May 16, 2007 Share Posted May 16, 2007 b] Tell him to get the hell off your porch and don't come back again. I actually had an experience slightly like this happen to me a few months back. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jumbo 0 Posted May 18, 2007 Share Posted May 18, 2007 At 130am I would tell them to get the hell off the porch but I always a sucker for giving people handouts, Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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