Sporting News article

[BAMMERPERRY 0]

Personally I think this article is way off. I don't think any SEC coaches are afraid of us. Auburn owns us Tommy Tuberville is Nick Saban's daddy.

From Sporting News

SEC East will be a beast on the football field

May 14, 2007

It's a debate I have often with many people every year at this time of year -- even the punk shoveling popcorn behind the counter at the Target snack bar.

Which SEC division will be better, the East or West?

Honestly, this is like being forced to defend the merits of steak over lobster. (Or, the hot dog over the soft pretzel at Target.) But, a choice must be made ... and I'm going with the East.

But, let me say this: I think the West will have more elite teams in 2007. LSU is a legit national contender. Auburn looks like a solid Top 15 team that could be even better. And Alabama is the ultimate wild card. In fact, I wouldn't be shocked if the Tide wins the SEC. Really. The SEC coaches I have spoken with all concur -- with a hint of dread in their voices.

Despite that mega-power at the top, the East will be better than the West this fall because of its quality from teams 1-6.

In the East, it's the same story, different year: Florida, Georgia and Tennessee again will be a holy terror of a trio that will set the standard. Each is a Top 25 team, and the Gators could surprise and defend their national title if the talented-but-young defense develops quickly. Georgia always is the best-coached team. Watch quarterback Matthew Stafford become a star. A coach who has -- ahem -- a sense of urgency to win big will lead always-talented Tennessee.

And then there's South Carolina. You know, I know and your Aunt Mabel knows it's a matter of when-- not if -- the Gamecocks will start winning big with you-know-who scribbling Xs and Os on the sideline.

But the reason why the East will have the edge is because of -- get this -- Vandy and Kentucky. Yeah, I know: Incredible, isn't it? The SEC sad sacks are punching back. Bobby Johnson, one of the best coaches in this galaxy, will have his best edition yet of nerds in Nashville. And the Wildcats are talking like its 1998, when Tim Couch led Big Blue to a New Year's Day bowl vs. Penn State. Is UK's Andre' Woodson the best quarterback in the SEC? Let that debate rage, too.

The non-elite teams of the West? I don't see them on par with the working class of the East. Arkansas has become a daytime drama of "As the Hog Turns" and Mississippi State remains, well, Mississippi State, though things are improving. Ole Miss offers the most hope among the second-class West schools, but the Rebs' quarterback situation could become a quandary.

What's it mean? The East will be a beast, the best it has been since this super conference split into divisions in 1992.

BEST 2007 SEC EAST-WEST MATCHUPS Sept. 8: Alabama at Vanderbilt

Sept. 22: Georgia at Alabama; South Carolina at LSU; Florida at Ole Miss; Kentucky at Arkansas

Sept. 29: Auburn at Florida

Oct. 6: Florida at LSU

Oct. 13: LSU at Kentucky; Tennessee at Mississippi State

Oct. 20: Tennessee at Alabama

Nov.3: South Carolina at Arkansas

Nov. 10: Auburn at Georgia; Arkansas at Tennessee

__________________

http://www.sportingnews.com/yourturn/viewtopic.php?t=207507

[WinCrimson 61]

I'd be pretty shocked if we won the West.

Thrilled, but shocked. I don't see anyone taking LSU down.

[TitanTiger 20,510]

You know what I hate? I hate it when you're on a four lane road and there are two cars in front of you, one in each lane. One is slightly ahead of the other and they might even trade places with one moving ahead for a little while, then the other. But neither will go fast enough to give you room to squeeze between and pass them. So traffic piles up behind them as they go just under the speed limit.

Any other driving pet peeves?

[otterinbham 0]

To borrow GG's "Shovel To The Face" notion, here goes:

Driving Outrage #1

Q: What's this lever on the side of the steering wheel that makes a rhythmic noise whenever I push it up or down?

A: It's a TURN SIGNAL you miserable bastage. Learn how to use it! [bAM! SHOVEL TO THE FACE!]

Driving Outrage #2

Also, mobile phone usage when people drive. Yes, I talk on the mobile phone when I drive. Everybody else on the planet talks on the planet when they drive. Anybody who claims not to talk on the mobile phone when they drive is a complete liar.

That being said, I also know when to hang up the thing. Or tell somebody, "Hold on, I'm trying to park the car."

Yesterday, I was driving down Highland Avenue in Birmingham, cutting it close for an appointment, when some woman driving a Denali stops in the middle of the road, and proceeds to make a laborious three-point turnaround in the middle of the road (Except it took her five turns) while NEVER HANGING UP HER MOBILE PHONE.

People were honking at her and flipping her off. And all she could do is stare at them, as if to say, "What's your problem people?"

BAM! SHOVEL TO THE FACE!

Driving Outrage #3

You know the people. The self appointed speed wardens on the interstate. The people who camp out in the passing lane and drive the speed limit. And then they look at you with an affronted expression when you finally pass them.

Okay, for review: The left hand lane on the Interstate is NOT the fast lane. It is the PASSING LANE. You stay in the right-hand lane until you need to pass somebody. Then you pass them and return to the right-hand lane.

BAM! SHOVEL TO THE FACE!

[BigSammyK 171]

To borrow GG's "Shovel To The Face" notion, here goes:

Driving Outrage #1

Q: What's this lever on the side of the steering wheel that makes a rhythmic noise whenever I push it up or down?

A: It's a TURN SIGNAL you miserable bastage. Learn how to use it! [bAM! SHOVEL TO THE FACE!]

Add to the list: Drivers who are too wrapped up in their own little world to realize they never turned their turn single off. I HATE THAT.

[Tiger1992 999]

How about when you're at a stop light and the moron next to you/behind/ahead of you has his radio blaring so loud it rattles your car (and in my case bothers your young kids). Hey dumbass, I don't want to hear Outkast played so loud it loosens the fillings in my teeth.

BAM BAM DOUBLE SHOVEL TO THE FACE!!

[abrnfanatc 6]

To borrow GG's "Shovel To The Face" notion, here goes:

Driving Outrage #1

Q: What's this lever on the side of the steering wheel that makes a rhythmic noise whenever I push it up or down?

A: It's a TURN SIGNAL you miserable bastage. Learn how to use it! [bAM! SHOVEL TO THE FACE!]

Add to the list: Drivers who are too wrapped up in their own little world to realize they never turned their turn single off. I HATE THAT.

I've had my left blinker on since 1985, but I'm actually turning right.

My biggest pet peeves are the folks who stay in the left lane from beginning to end of their trip. I have always wanted to buy on old beater, drive in to work one day in it and bounce people out of that lane like pinballs. That would be cool.

Also, 99% of the time you have to move right to get around one of these jokers, they are talking on the phone.

Please deposit another $.25...bam, to the guardrail.

[AUesquire 1]

Okay, here's one that never ceases to amaze me. If you go in to a median, either to turn left across traffic or make a U-turn, drive to the far end of the median opening. Guess what, when you cut your turn too sharp and stop, people in oncoming traffic who are coming into that same median crossover....CAN'T SEE...YOU PUTZ. Since you didn't go to the far end of the median opening, you've blocked everyone's vision in oncoming traffic who are trying to turn and now YOU can't see either.

BAM!! SHOVEL TO THE CRANIUM.

[GalensGhost 0]

I hate the people who won't seize the intersection.

They're turning left but there's no left turn lane. Heavy traffic coming the other way. So they sit there. They never move foward enough to make the left turn when the light turns yellow. They don't block the crossing traffic so they can get through. Instead they sit there through light after light. When you lay on the horn, they flop around in the seat gyrating and pointing to the traffic as if you don't see it.

Makes you want to get out of your car and demolish their windshield with a shovel.

[saniflush 0]

I hate the people who won't seize the intersection.

They're turning left but there's no left turn lane. Heavy traffic coming the other way. So they sit there. They never move foward enough to make the left turn when the light turns yellow. They don't block the crossing traffic so they can get through. Instead they sit there through light after light. When you lay on the horn, they flop around in the seat gyrating and pointing to the traffic as if you don't see it.

Makes you want to get out of your car and demolish their windshield with a shovel.

Subset to Galens Group.

I hate the people who are in the trying to turn against traffic and do not follow the three car rule. Example, there is no turn signal for a left hand turn and heavy oncoming traffic. You cannot shoot the gap on a circular green. Once it turns yellow and the oncoming traffic yeilds a few of the ones from the front need to scoot on across. If it is not at least two vehicles you get shovels to the face.

[AU alum 2]

My pet peeve -

When two lanes are changing to one lane, there is always an idiot that cuts in front of you so close, he almost causes a wreck. THEN he goes real slow. He does not need to be slammed with a shovel in the face. I will not be specific, but the shovel should be used on another portion of his body. And I almost forgot this. Almost always, the idiot in question is a redneck in an old very beat up truck with guess what kind of stickers?

[ssgaufan 0]

Okay, here's one that never ceases to amaze me. If you go in to a median, either to turn left across traffic or make a U-turn, drive to the far end of the median opening. Guess what, when you cut your turn too sharp and stop, people in oncoming traffic who are coming into that same median crossover....CAN'T SEE...YOU PUTZ. Since you didn't go to the far end of the median opening, you've blocked everyone's vision in oncoming traffic who are trying to turn and now YOU can't see either.

BAM!! SHOVEL TO THE CRANIUM.

Completely agree with you. It only gets better when you and an oncoming car are approaching the median at the same time, and when you try to go to the far end, they are trying to cut it short and then look at you like you are the STUPID one.

BAM!!BAM!! DOUBLE SHOVEL TO THE CRANIUM FOR THIS.

[otterinbham 0]

Oh, here's another one I love:

When two lanes merge into one because of construction, the helpful highway department puts out signs for about a mile ahead of the construction site that say "Prepare to Merge -- 1 mile," followed by the equally informative "Prepare to Merge -- 1/2 mile," "Prepare to Merge -- 500 yards," etc.

So as you dutifully merge and wait your turn like the rest of the considerate drivers on the planet, there's always one abomination who drives all the way up to the merger point, and then tries to squeeze his way into the line. Somebody tried to do that to me the other day, I wouldn't let the miserable bastage in. He really got pissed, too.

Yet the woman behind me let the guy in! Folks, when you do that, you're not a samaritan. All you are doing is rewarding bad behavior.

So two shovels to the head of the guy who waits until the last minute to merge, and one shovel to the head of the person who lets it happen. BAM! BAM! BAM!

[lca408 366]

Oh, here's another one I love:

When two lanes merge into one because of construction, the helpful highway department puts out signs for about a mile ahead of the construction site that say "Prepare to Merge -- 1 mile," followed by the equally informative "Prepare to Merge -- 1/2 mile," "Prepare to Merge -- 500 yards," etc.

So as you dutifully merge and wait your turn like the rest of the considerate drivers on the planet, there's always one abomination who drives all the way up to the merger point, and then tries to squeeze his way into the line. Somebody tried to do that to me the other day, I wouldn't let the miserable bastage in. He really got pissed, too.

Yet the woman behind me let the guy in! Folks, when you do that, you're not a samaritan. All you are doing is rewarding bad behavior.

So two shovels to the head of the guy who waits until the last minute to merge, and one shovel to the head of the person who lets it happen. BAM! BAM! BAM!

YES YES YES! I hate those horrible "bastages."

I experienced one the other night. Don't you hate it when you're passing someone and there's just enough room between your car and the passee for another car to zip right through, nearly knocking your front end away?

I nearly ran the asswipe off the road the other night. Unfortunately, he turned before I could do the same to him. Of course, I may have been in a pissy mood anyway, after I saw the travesty that Tony committed on the Sopranos that night.

Ryan

[drewau02 0]

I love it when I'm stopped at a red light, awaiting to go left. The guy/gal across from me wants to go straight and has the right-a-way. When the light turns green, I take a quick left in front of them before they even apply pressure on the gas. Okay, maybe it doesn't annoy me, but it sure annoys the heck out of them.

[GalensGhost 0]

I may have been in a pissy mood anyway, after I saw the travesty that Tony committed on the Sopranos that night.

Ryan

What was up with that? It threw me off my game, too.

[WarTiger 3,916]

quick....just heard it on the radio a few minutes ago...

what city leads the country in ROAD RAGE??

anyone??

[drewau02 0]

quick....just heard it on the radio a few minutes ago...

what city leads the country in ROAD RAGE??

anyone??

Auburn University, AL at 12 noon during the weekdays. It's 93 degrees outside. The traffic is jammed because the students just got out of class. If you didn't have road rage before, you'll have it now.

[TDAuburn 2]

How about these:

1. You're at a red light, the crossing traffic has the green, but traffic is backing up. What do they do?... block the intersection. Meanwhile, your light turns green, and now you sit for maybe an entire green light because some bozo was impatient.

2. The driver that's doing 45mph in a 55mph zone... UNTIL you try to pass. Somehow my draft pulls these a**holes up to 70mph or so during my pass. (This is not a problem on the bike.)

3. When you're at a stop light, just maybe there are people waiting on that light behind you. Pay attention, when the light turns green, go. I've seen people simply forget they were at a light, fooling with the radio or whatever, and get pissed when I honk the horn maybe 10 seconds after the light has changed.

[Guest Tigrinum Major]

Birmingham.

[Tiger in Spain 0]

quick....just heard it on the radio a few minutes ago...

what city leads the country in ROAD RAGE??

anyone??

Miami....because of Brian.

[otterinbham 0]

quick....just heard it on the radio a few minutes ago...

what city leads the country in ROAD RAGE??

anyone??

Miami would be my guess. Holy crap. I was there on business last Spring, and it was this terrible combination of hot-blooded Cubans and ill-tempered old people.

[otterinbham 0]

Here's another one of mine: People leaning on their horn precisely one nanosecond after the light turns green.

[abrnfanatc 6]

Birmingham.

If true, I completely understand why.

While we are on the Ham, another peeve is those damn overhead signs that tell us absolutely nothing.

Thanks ALDOT, instead of slow traffic all the way from Trussville to Birmingham, we get two scheduled stops on the way. Billy Bob can't read, but he's gotta stop to see the same freaking message that was on there yesterday morning "Have a Nice Day."

Two shovels to the ALDOT faces, one for each worthless sign.

[AU alum 2]

Here's another one of mine: People leaning on their horn precisely one nanosecond after the light turns green.

Want to piss them off? When they honk just wave like they're long lost friends.