CCTAU 3,350 Posted December 8, 2003 Share Posted December 8, 2003 Hillary Clinton goes to a primary school in New York to talk about the world. After her talk she offers question time. One little boy puts up his hand, and the Senator asks him what his name is. "Kenneth", he answers. "And what is your question, Kenneth?" "I have three questions: First - whatever happened to your medical health care plan? Second - why would you run for President after your husband shamed the office? And Third - whatever happened to all those things you took when you left the White House?" Just then the bell rings for recess. Hillary Clinton informs the kiddies that they will continue after recess. When they resume Hillary says, "Okay where were we? Oh, that's right, question time. Who has a question?" A different little boy puts his hand up; Hillary points him out and asks him what his name is. "Larry." "And what is your question, Larry?" "I have five questions: First - whatever happened to your medical health care plan? Second - why would you run for President after your husband shamed the office? Third - whatever happened to all those things you took when you left the White House? Fourth - why did the recess bell go off 20 minutes early? And Fifth - what happened to Kenneth?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tiger in Spain 0 Posted December 8, 2003 Share Posted December 8, 2003 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Donutboy 0 Posted December 8, 2003 Share Posted December 8, 2003 Bush and Powell Plan World War III Bush and Powell were sitting in a bar. A guy walked in and asked the barman, "Isn't that Bush and Powell?" The barman said, "Yep, that's them." So the guy walked over and said, "Hello. What are you guys doing?" Bush said, "We're planning World War III." The guy asked, "Really? What's going to happen?" Bush said, "Well, we're going to kill 10 million Iraqis and one bicycle repairman." The guy exclaimed, "Why are you gonna kill a bicycle repairman?!" Bush turned to Powell and said, "See, I told you no one would worry about the 10 million Iraqis!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Donutboy 0 Posted December 8, 2003 Share Posted December 8, 2003 OK... OK... Didn't want to post more than the one joke but this one is "your" joke but modified for Democrats. During a recent fundraising tour, President Bush visits a school to explain his politics to kids. He invites the kids to ask him questions. Bobby stands up and tells him "Mr. President, I got 3 questions": 1. How come, that although the count of votes was not in your favor, you still won the election? 2. Why do you want to attack Iraq without an imminent reason? 3. Don't you also consider the bombing of Hiroshima the biggest terrorist attack of all times? Before the president can answer, the recess bell rings, and the kids leave the room. After they came back, Bush invited them again to ask questions. Joey stands up and tells him "Mr. President, I got 5 questions": 1. How come, that although the count of votes was not in your favor, you still won the election? 2. Why do you want to attack Iraq without an imminent reason? 3. Don't you also consider the bombing of Hiroshima the biggest terrorist attack of all times? 4. Why did the recess bell ring 20 minutes early? 5. Where's Bobby? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tigermike 3,058 Posted December 8, 2003 Share Posted December 8, 2003 If TigerAl & Donutboy hate Bush, what does that say about them? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tiger Al 0 Posted December 8, 2003 Share Posted December 8, 2003 If TigerAl & Donutboy hate Bush, what does that say about them? And...this fits into the context of the thread...how??? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tigermike 3,058 Posted December 8, 2003 Share Posted December 8, 2003 If TigerAl & Donutboy hate Bush, what does that say about them? And...this fits into the context of the thread...how??? Wasn't this a joke thread? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tiger in Spain 0 Posted December 8, 2003 Share Posted December 8, 2003 Q: What's the difference between a Democrat and a prostitute? A: The prostitute gives value for the money she takes. Q: What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead Democrat in the road? A: Vultures will eat the skunk. Q: What do you get when you cross a bad politician with a crooked lawyer? A: Chelsea. Q: Why did God create Democrats? A: In order to make used car salesmen look good. Q. How many Democrats does it take to screw in a light bulb? A. Just one, but it really gets screwed. Q: How many Democrats does it take to change a light bulb? A: It's irrelevant; they still don't know they're in the dark! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DKW 86 7,448 Posted December 8, 2003 Share Posted December 8, 2003 Q: What's the difference between a Democrat and a prostitute?A: The prostitute gives value for the money she takes. Q: What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead Democrat in the road? A: Vultures will eat the skunk. Q: What do you get when you cross a bad politician with a crooked lawyer? A: Chelsea. Q: Why did God create Democrats? A: In order to make used car salesmen look good. Q. How many Democrats does it take to screw in a light bulb? A. Just one, but it really gets screwed. Q: How many Democrats does it take to change a light bulb? A: It's irrelevant; they still don't know they're in the dark! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
poboy4AU 0 Posted December 8, 2003 Share Posted December 8, 2003 The Pope met with his Cardinals to discuss a proposal from Benjamin > Netanyahu, the leader of Israel. "Your Holiness", said one of his > Cardinals, Mr. Netanyahu wants to challenge you to a game of golf to show > the friendship and ecumenical spirit shared by the Jewish and Catholic > faiths." > > The Pope thought this was a good idea, but he had never held a golf club > in his hand. "Don't we have a Cardinal to represent me?" he asked. > > "None that plays very well," a Cardinal replied. "But," he added, "there > is a man named Jack Nicklaus, an American golfer who is a devout Catholic. > > We can offer to make him a Cardinal, then ask him to play Mr. Netanyahu as > your personal representative. In addition to showing our spirit of > cooperation, we'll also win the match." > > Everyone agreed it was a good idea. The call was made. Of course, Nicklaus > was honored and agreed to play. The day after the match, Nicklaus reported > to the Vatican to inform the Pope of the result. "I have some good news > and some bad news, your Holiness, " said the golfer. > > "Tell me the good news first, Cardinal Nicklaus," said the Pope. > > "Well, your Holiness, I don't like to brag, but even though I've played > some pretty terrific rounds of golf in my life, this was the best I have > ever played, by far. I must've been inspired from above. My drives were > long and true, my irons were accurate and purposeful, and my putting was > perfect. With all due respect, my play was truly miraculous. > > "There's bad news?" the Pope asked. > > "Yes," Nicklaus sighed. "I lost to Rabbi Tiger Woods by three strokes Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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