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Is everyone ready for an early Christmas tale?!


WarDamnAmerica

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A friend sent this to me in an e-mail...I know its not Christmas time yet, but it is IRON BOWL time!

Twas the Night before the Iron Bowl, when all through the land,

The media morons were still in search of one eighty grand.

Cam wasn’t worried, he had not even a care,

The only thing puzzling him was, “Who is this Bear?”

The bams were all laughing and full of themselves,

Each one convinced there would be something else.

Thayer and Schlabaugh had broken the news,

And Finebaum was convinced there must be more shoes.

When out of the east, there arose a great fuss,

As each Auburn player made his way to the bus.

On toward t-town the driver did go,

It was just about time for Cam to put on his show.

Their plan was failing and lies being exposed,

As Cam rode on the bus and peacefully dozed.

When what to their wondering eyes should appear,

But their miniature coach, awestruck with fear.

Standing five feet tall, a lively ole prick,

I knew in a moment it must be Lil’ Nick.

Curse those “War Eagles” his minions they came,

And he snorted and snarled as he called them by name.

“Now, Thayer! Now, Finebaum! Now Schad and Schlabaugh!

On Herbstreit! On Holtz! Yes! You’ve assisted the cause!

To ESPN, Fox News and them all,

Now bash away, bash away, bash away all.

We must tell more lies about cheating and cash,

Or pray to The Bear that their team bus will crash.

They are almost here and I don’t have a plan.

No one has stopped him, he just ran and he ran!

I have watched so much film and I’ve plotted and schemed,

But he is so much better than I ever had dreamed.

He zigs and he zags and I swear that he flies,

He does things on the field not seen with my eyes.

We will not stop him, like so many before,

They will move the ball at will and easily score.

Our fans will be furious and then start to clamor,

When Cam jumps in the crowd and leads the reverse “rammer jammer”.

So off to Texas I will run, as fast as I can,

And meet with Jerry Jones, since he is the man.

I will leave bammer hanging and holding the bag,

Merry Christmas you rednecks, now print that on bamamag.

War Eagle!

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